Sexuality is how you experience and express your sexual feelings. It includes who you are attracted to, either romantically or sexually, who you choose to have sex with, and what sexual acts you like.
If you are trying to work out how you feel, what you’re into, and who you’re attracted to, you&39;re not alone. It can take time to understand your sexual orientation and it doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with you.
Your sexuality is personal to you and everyone is different. The important thing is to be comfortable with who you are and how you feel. It’s healthy to enjoy and explore your sexual feelings, whatever your sexuality.
What is sexual orientation?
The meaning of sexual orientation, also known as your sexuality, is a way to describe your sexual feelings. It includes who you are attracted to, either romantically or sexually, who you choose to have sex with, what type of sex you like having and what turns you on.
It can take time to work out what&39;s right for you so don&39;t worry if you&39;re not sure yet! Although there are some labels like gay, straight and bi not everyone fits into one category or another and that&39;s absolutely fine.
How can I work out what my sexuality is?
Begin by getting to know yourself and developing the confidence to talk about your feelings and desires. You could start by talking it over with friends.
Many people also find masturbation (pleasuring yourself) a good way tostart exploring what turns them on. Once you begin to understand your sexuality you might want toexplore it with someone else. Remember this doesn’t need to involve sex.Foreplay, such as flirting, kissing and sensual touching, are great ways to start exploring your sexuality with someone else.
As you begin your sexual journey it’s important to understand that you never have to do anything you don’t want to do. Ourvideo on consentexplains this in more detail.
What if I am confused about my sexuality?
Don’t worry this is totally normal! If you have never had a sexual relationship, you may not know who you will be attracted to. Or you may feel your sexuality has changed over time. These feelings are very common.
Am I gay, lesbian or bisexual? What if none of these labels fit me?
Some people use words like ‘gay’, ‘bi’ or ‘queer’ to help define their sexuality. But some people don’t feel that any of these words fit their sexuality or don’t want to be labelled at all.
Below are some common terms people use to describe their sexuality and sexual orientation (who you are attracted to). Different ones might be used where you live.
Asexual:
Not sexually attracted to anyone.
Bisexual (bi):
Sexually attracted to more than one gender.
Curious (bicurious):
Not purely heterosexual or homosexual but sometimes curious about or open to sexual activity with the gender you are not normally attracted to.
Heterosexual (straight):
Sexually attracted to the opposite gender.
Homosexual:
Sexually attracted to the same gender.
Gay:
Same as homosexual – often used particularly to describe men who are attracted to other men.
Lesbian:
Women who are attracted to other women.
Pansexual (pan):
Sexually attracted to people of any gender or sexual orientation.
Queer:
It was used as an insult but now many LGBT+ people use it as a way to describe any sexuality that isn’t heterosexual without needing a specific label.
Questioning:
Still exploring or unsure about your sexuality.
You may find that all parts of your sexuality match up. For example, you might be a man who is attracted to men and identifies as gay. Or you may find your sexuality is more complicated. For example, you might be a woman who is attracted to men and identifies as straight but is also attracted to women.
What if I’m ready to explore my sexuality by having sex?
Talk to your partner about what you enjoy and listen to what they want. And only do things you both feel comfortable with. Before you do anything, make sure you understand how to prevent, other, and.
If you identify as a gay man, then it’s worth reading our tips onhot and healthy relationships. You may also want to check out our video series ongay health, sex and HIV.
Whatever your sexual orientation there are manythings to think throughbefore you have sex for the first time.
Talking to your partner about HIV is just one thing to consider. It might feel like the biggest passion killer, but it’s important and there are ways to do itwithout dampening the mood.
What&39;s the difference between sexuality and gender?
You may or may not feel you ‘fit’ into the category of ‘girl’ or ‘boy’. These thingsrelate to your gender identity. This is different to your sexuality and your sexual orientation.
People who identify as a different gender to the one they were given at birth are known astransgender people.
