It's common to orgasm faster than your partner, so don't beat yourself up. Fortunately, most people who orgasm quickly can learn how to last longer. Exercise and lifestyle changes can help improve control, and there are many techniques you can try to delay orgasm during sex. Orgasm-control products and medications are also worth a try.
1. Relax and encourage yourself
Dealing with anxiety or self-doubt can have a serious impact on your mood, so try to stay positive. Studies show that anxiety can affect sexual desire, arousal, and orgasm.
Don't dwell on whether you performed poorly, and you shouldn't be disappointed in yourself.
Calling yourself by name is more effective when engaging in positive self-talk.
2. Work on prolonging your masturbation time
By controlling yourself, you can better control how quickly you ejaculate and reach orgasm.
Don't use lubricants when you masturbate at first, and stop as soon as you start to feel like you're about to ejaculate. Wait until the feeling subsides before you start masturbating again.
You can also try masturbating an hour or two before intercourse to help delay orgasm.
3. Start doing pelvic floor exercises
Exercising the muscles that control ejaculation can help you last longer. To find these muscles, stop urinating midway and tighten the muscles that prevent you from passing gas.
To exercise them, tighten them for 3 seconds, then relax for 3 seconds. Repeat this cycle 5 to 10 times.
It may be easier to do this while lying or sitting at first, but try standing up as well. As your muscles strengthen, aim to do 3 sets of 10 reps each day.
Try to tighten only the muscles that help you control urination and passing gas. Don't just bend your hips or thighs.
Breathe normally during the exercise and avoid holding your breath.
4. Reduce alcohol and drug use
Alcohol and drug use can cause premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, and other sexual problems.
Avoid drugs and alcohol before sex, and try to reduce your overall use.
5. Address any issues in your relationship
If you and your partner have any problems, these issues may be causing problems with your sex life.
Address these issues together and your sex life will improve and last longer.
1. Try to stimulate your partner first
Give your partner some stimulation, but don't stimulate yourself or let them touch your sensitive parts.
This way, your excitement and orgasm will be synchronized to be closer to the same time.
2. Move slowly
Taking it slow can help you last longer, so try to value the process more than the destination.
Think of sex as a sexy dance, not a series of quick movements.
3. Try new positions
Changing positions can help you refocus and reset your excitement. In addition, trying new positions can get your body out of a routine.
If you have your partner on top during sex, they will pull away when they feel you approaching, helping you last longer.
If a position always seems to work, save it for last
4. When you feel you're about to orgasm, take a slow, deep breath
When you feel you're about to orgasm, take a slow, deep breath, expanding your abdomen as you inhale. Hold your breath for 2 to 3 seconds, then exhale slowly.
Continue to breathe slowly until you no longer feel close to orgasm.
5. Think about something else for a while
When you feel like you're about to ejaculate, try to distract yourself by thinking about something non-sexual, like work, exercise, a TV show, or school. Temporarily distracting yourself can help you relax and slow down.
Try not to spend all your time thinking about something else. You still want to be in the moment and focus on pleasing your partner.
6. Try taking a break
Take a break for about 30 seconds, then start having sex again. Repeat the stop and start method until both you and your partner are ready to orgasm.
You can also take a deep breath or think about something else while you take a break.
7. Try the squeeze method
When you feel like you're about to ejaculate, withdraw your penis from your partner. Then you (or your partner) gently squeeze the underside of the glans where it meets the shaft of the penis. Squeeze for a few seconds, then wait about 30 seconds before starting intercourse again.
Don't squeeze too hard, and don't use the technique if it causes pain or discomfort.
1. Wear thicker condoms
Go to your local drugstore to see if there are condoms with controlled orgasm. They are thicker, and some brands contain anesthetics to help temporarily reduce sensitivity.
You can also wear 2 condoms to further reduce sensitivity.
2. Use desensitizing lubricants
You can buy local anesthetics online or at your local drugstore. They come in the form of creams, sprays, and wipes, and are usually applied 10 to 15 minutes before intercourse.
Wear a condom when using local anesthetics to avoid reducing your partner's sensitivity.
3. Ask your healthcare provider about prescription medications
If you don't have any luck with other solutions, ask your doctor or pharmacist if oral medications are effective. Taking a low dose of SSRI a few hours before intercourse can help delay orgasm.
If you have both erectile dysfunction (ED) and premature ejaculation, prescription medications for ED may be effective for both problems.
