A "ruined orgasm" (also known as a "forced orgasm") is a technique where the person experiences the physical sensations of orgasm but in a way that is intentionally interrupted or less pleasurable than usual. It's often used in certain BDSM or power exchange contexts where there's a psychological element to the experience. It can be an intense, sometimes frustrating, or even pleasurable experience depending on how it's done. Here are the common steps involved:
• Start by building sexual tension and excitement, either through direct stimulation or by engaging in extended foreplay. This builds anticipation and increases arousal.
• You can use the “stop•start” technique (stopping stimulation just before orgasm) or other forms of edging (bringing someone close to orgasm repeatedly but not letting them climax).
• As the person nears climax, you may either continue stimulating or briefly stop, creating a wave of frustration.
• The idea is to get them to the edge of orgasm and then stop or reduce the intensity, causing a heightened sense of urgency or anticipation.
• Just before the person reaches orgasm, you might suddenly alter the stimulation by stopping or changing it abruptly. This could involve slowing down, switching from one type of stimulation to another, or using an unexpected action (like pinching or light physical pressure) that cuts the orgasm short.
• Some people enjoy the contrast of experiencing intense arousal without the expected release, while others find it frustrating in a way that can heighten the mental and emotional intensity of the experience.
• Since ruined orgasms can create a mix of frustration, confusion, and intense sensation, aftercare is important. It involves providing comfort, reassurance, and tenderness afterward, as the emotional impact can be strong for some people.
• Ruined orgasms often have a psychological component, especially in contexts of power play or dominance/submission. The power dynamic of controlling or denying orgasm can increase the emotional impact.
• For some, the psychological frustration or "denial" can be a huge part of the appeal, as it shifts the experience from simply a physical release to a more intense, emotional experience.
• As with any sexual activity, communication is key. Make sure all participants are comfortable and have consented to the activity. Discuss boundaries beforehand to ensure that everyone involved feels safe and respected.
• It's also important to understand each person’s tolerance and enjoyment levels, as some may find this type of experience less pleasurable than others.
Ruined orgasms can be a fun way to play with control, pleasure, and frustration in a consensual, safe environment. However, it’s important to have clear communication, ensure both parties understand the dynamics, and check in with each other before and after.
