It depends what your definition of “wrong” is, and your own set of morals and values.
Here’s how I see it.
Personally, I would NEVER cheat. Never have, never will. It is the most ultimate form of disrespect in a closed relationship. As a psychologist, I have seen first hand how deeply cheating can mess someone up mentally, and ruin future relationships for them. I would never put someone through that.
That being said, I have slept with many married men, and many men who were in relationships, without regret at that.
When two people are in a relationship, they owe it to each other to be loyal to one another. They OWE that to one another because of the vows and promises they have made by being in a closed relationship. That is why I will never cheat. But when I’m single, I am free to do what I want, with whomever I want. If they are in a relationship, it means nothing to me. I didn’t make a promise or vow to his partner, it’s not my job to ensure his loyalty to her. I owe her nothing. I am worried about me, and what I want. And if I want sex and he is willing to give it to me, so be it. He is the bad guy here, not me. He is the one who broke his vows, lied, cheated, snuck around behind her back, inflicting emotional pain upon her, all of these things because he was supposedly committed to her. I however am committed to nobody, don’t owe anything to anyone, am not sneaking around, cheating, or lying. My conscience is clear.
If I am ever in a relationship and my man cheats on me, I blame him, not the girl he cheated with. She doesn’t owe anything to me, I don’t know her. But he owes me everything, he is my partner. I deserve the respect of having him honor his vow and commitment to me. By cheating, he has broken this bond, this trust, and is the bad guy. She has done nothing to me personally in terms of respect, honor, or vows in my opinion. While I’m certainly not going to rush to be her best friend, I do not blame her. She didn’t cheat on me, he did and he would have done it with anyone.
So my answer is no, it is not wrong of you, it is wrong of her. It doesn’t matter how much “seducing” you do. She has the power to say no, or not engage in conversation with you whatsoever. By doing so she opens herself open to temptation, and acting upon it makes her wrong, a liar, and a cheater.
