Controlling orgasm, especially delaying or maintaining control before orgasm, involves physical and mental coordination. The techniques for controlling orgasm are different for men and women, but the basic principles are to understand your body's reactions, increase self-awareness, and regulate your rhythm through breathing, muscle control, etc.
For men:
By practicing Kegel exercises, men can increase their ability to control orgasm. These exercises help control the ejaculation reflex. During practice, men can improve their control over orgasm by contracting and relaxing their pelvic floor muscles (also called pubococcygeus muscles). With practice, men can learn to regulate these muscles during sexual activity, thereby delaying orgasm.
This is a classic technique used to delay ejaculation. When a man is close to orgasm, he can pause the sexual activity and stop all stimulation until the sensation subsides before continuing. Repeating this process several times can help improve the ability to control orgasm.
This method usually requires the help of a partner. When a man is close to orgasm, his partner can use his hand to gently squeeze the base of the penis (the area between the penis and scrotum). This can temporarily reduce sexual excitement and thus delay orgasm.
Changing the rhythm or posture of sexual intercourse when feeling close to orgasm can also help a man control orgasm. For example, slowing down the rhythm or switching to a less deep insertion position can help reduce stimulation to the genitals and thus delay orgasm.
When approaching orgasm, shifting attention to other physical sensations, such as deep breathing, physical contact, and the expression or voice of your partner, can help slow the onset of orgasm. Avoiding excessive focus on genital stimulation can prolong the duration of sexual intercourse.
Through self-control and awareness, a man can practice delaying orgasm while masturbating. This can help him learn to recognize an impending orgasm and control it, and then apply this technique in his sex life with his partner.
For women:
Women can also practice Kegel exercises to enhance their control over orgasm. By contracting and relaxing the muscles around the vagina, women can improve their sense of control over orgasm and enhance pleasure during orgasm. Exercising these muscles not only helps control orgasm, but also increases the intensity of sexual pleasure.
Deep breathing and body relaxation techniques help women stay calm as orgasm approaches. By breathing slowly and deeply, women can reduce the degree of sexual excitement and avoid reaching orgasm too early. This also helps to enhance the quality and depth of orgasm.
Similar to the "stop-start" technique for men, women can also try to pause stimulation when approaching orgasm, wait a while, and then resume stimulation. Through multiple interruptions and resumptions, women can learn to control the arrival of orgasm and enjoy a more gradual orgasmic experience.
During sexual intercourse, women can control orgasm by adjusting the rhythm and stimulation method. Slowing down the stimulation and gently changing the location or depth of stimulation can help women delay the onset of orgasm. For example, by gently stimulating the clitoris or changing the angle of insertion appropriately, women can maintain control over their orgasm.
Women need to learn to be more self-aware of their body reactions during sexual activity. When they feel they are about to orgasm, they can avoid reaching orgasm too early by reminding themselves and focusing on relaxation and controlling excitement. Staying calm and focusing on the process, rather than pursuing orgasm under pressure, can help delay the onset of orgasm.
Emotional connection and intimate interaction can sometimes enhance control over orgasm. Through deep communication with their partners and enhanced intimacy, women can gradually enjoy the process of orgasm without pressure and control the timing of orgasm.
General techniques:
Regular meditation and deep relaxation training can help enhance control over orgasm. Meditation can increase self-awareness and relax the body, while reducing anxiety and stress during sexual activity, allowing you to better control the timing of orgasm.
Over-focusing on orgasm often leads to anxiety and tension, which makes orgasm difficult to control. Orgasm should be a natural process, not an over-pursued goal. Keeping a relaxed and happy state of mind and avoiding thinking too much about orgasm can help orgasm come smoothly.
Regular practice through masturbation or sexual intercourse with a partner can enhance control over orgasm. Through continuous attempts, you will become more familiar with your physiological reactions and thus improve your ability to control orgasm.
